“Television shows have to reflect the sociological changes in life,” agrees Tara Ariano, a pop-culture columnist with The National Post and co-creator of the cultish website Television Without Pity. “Moms on TV, like real moms, have to have jobs and interests other than just raising their kids,” she says. TV mothers like Lois on Malcolm in the Middle, Bree on Desperate Housewives and Debra on Everybody Loves Raymond, rule the roost or bring home the bacon themselves. Like their 1950s counterparts, these TV moms may be well-coiffed and beautiful, but they are a lot more ambitious and aspiring. So it stands to reason, in these workaholic times, that mothers’ lives are also bound to exhibit a lot more stress and conflict.

In the recent non-fiction book Perfect Madness: Motherhood in the Age of Anxiety, Judith Warner writes: “The working moms I knew were stressed near the breaking point, looking tired and haggard and old. They shared the same high level at-home parenting ambitions as the nonworking moms. But they held down out-of-home jobs too – and if this wasn’t enough they also had to shoulder the burden of Guilt, a media fed drone that played in their ears every time they sat in traffic at dinnertime: Had they made the right choices? Were they really good enough mothers?”

Ariano, for one, finds Rowan’s character happily free of the stereotypical trap of “mom guilt.” She says, “It bothers me when mothers on TV are upset or worried about the lack of time they spend with their offspring, but in Kirsten’s case it’s a non-issue. She’s got a life of her own and I find that refreshing.”

You only have to watch the traditional mom on a sitcom such as According to Jim to see how fresh the concept of the hip modern mother is on TV: Why is it just catching on now? Paget says, “Mothers haven’t become any more important. We’re only just acknowledging it now and making it public. They have always been cool. Think about it: They are one of the most powerful role models and mentors that you can have, and it is they who have the most influence on the children’s lives.” Earlier this year, a website poll on which actresses were the sexiest moms (Pamela Anderson and Jada Pinkett Smith, incidentally) stated: “In Hollywood, Hot Moms are as American as apple pie.”

As for Rowan, she hopes that the success of The O.C. will do its small part by creating a place for more roles featuring slightly older moms who are walking, talking role models of marrieds who are making it work. Her character is no ordinary housewife, and Rowan certainly doesn’t look desperate. Take that, Wisteria Lane. 

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