Lou Paget

Calgary-raised certified sex educator, author and TV host Lou Paget has built an empire around talking about relationships. (Her new book is called Hot Mamas. ) She was the subject of an episode of HBO’s Real Sex and is frequently quoted in magazines like Men’s Health and Cosmopolitan . Paget, a former personal-development coach, conducts more than 100 sexuality seminars each year.

enRoute What is your philosophy on sex education?

Lou Paget Sex educators have to make [information] as accessible and understandable as we can. This information should be respectful, accurate and non-judgmental. With my science background, I am adamant about having the most current research.

ER What were you taught about sex when you were growing up?

LP It’s what I refer to as the “don’t” umbrella: Don’t talk about it, don’t think about it and, above all, don’t do it.

ER How did you become a sex educator?

LP I figured that I couldn’t be the only one looking for information, so I just asked people about the best information they had received and their best experiences. I started out being the grassroots source for my girlfriends. And they said, “You have information that everybody wants; you’ve got to share it.”

ER Do you think female sex educators are treated differently from their male counterparts?

LP Let’s not put our heads in the sand. Women sex educators are held to a different standard. People automatically assume that if you know a lot, you’ve done a lot. But the information I deliver is not about me, so it’s easier for people to hear it. I’m “Teflon-ed,” as I say.

ER What makes you different from other sex educators?

LP I know what real people say and do. I get told things that women want men to know. I get told things that men want women to know.

ER What approach do you take to teaching sex ed?

LP To me, there is no dumb question if it is asked honestly. My job is not to say something is good, bad or indifferent. I’m not a therapist. I’m not analyzing what they’re doing. I would never say to someone, “You’re a complete idiot for doing that.”

ER Are people as interested in sex as always?

LP Definitely, yes. The two things that gave people more permission to talk about sex were the proliferation of information on the Internet – the ease of access so it was anonymous – and Sex and the City.

ER As a “Teflon-ed” professional, does anything shock you?

LP Let me put it this way: In almost every single seminar I do, I hear something that I’ve never heard before.

ER Do you ever get tired of talking about sex?

LP No, because there’s always something new.